Work, Work, Work

So I am actually working a full time job for Vector Marketing I am in the office M-F from 9 am until 5pm each day. Its a really good job, I get the oppertunity to work with on of my good friends Forrest Haderlie and that is a lot of fun, his wife Kate also comes in to the office as well. They are both very sweet spirits that make me want to  be a better person. I also work at Valleywide Home & Ranch I am working in the c-store. I love working with people and helping them with checking out. I get to meet and form relationships with people that come in. Of course sometimes I get the old men that enjoy hitting on me. lol. which is really awkward when they are old enough to  be my grandpa! lol. ewww!  I also work out in Terreton cleaning Rockwells, I really enjoy it. In every   job that I do, I have a drive to make it mine, and make it my best work. Which is never a bad thing, I just have found that I sometimes I have problems with authority. I don't like to be told what to do or bossed around.

So I just make it mine, at least in my brain. lol. Like you know I am working on improving myself and trying to improve my relationships with the people around me. And so a big part of that is appoligzing to the people that I have hurt/harmed/offended/belittled/etc. This step has really caused me a lot of pondering, on how people preceive me. I want to be precieved as a really kind, sweet person who wants the best for everyone. And I know that is who I am on the inside. But I allow myself to get jelous/angry/entitled/and very pridefull. That is the part of me that I don't like, and  the part of me that I want to work on. This step in my self renewal is going to take a lot of work. Because I know that I have hurt people including some people that I really love. And the thought of hurting them makes me sick. So If I have ever hurt you, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to hurt you and hurt our relationship. I love you and I want to work on it. I promise that I am going to be honest with you, as you have been with me. If I ever do anything that bothers you please let me know. It was never my intent to hurt you.